Audi Drivers Can Predict Accidents

Posted September 28, 2007

But that doesn’t stop them from getting behind the wheel.

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Imagine that you, the consumer, have been given a car with magical properties. One of these is that you can predict when and where you are going to get into an accident. Sounds like perfect accident prevention right? Wrong. Audi owners prove that not only do they ignore the warnings and just go on with their trip, but also subject their children to the inclement disasters as well.

Shame on you people. I mean it’s bad enough that you would get behind the wheel when you know that you are going to get into an accident, but to bring your future along with you? Furthermore how are you so calm?

Stoic Man: Today I am gonna get in a car accident.
Crazy Calm Dude: My accident will be the reason everyone is late to work.
Icewoman: In 20 minutes, I’ll be in a 3 car collision.
Fucking Assclown: Right at the end of the street I will get hit by someone who runs the light.
… Come on kids!
Dead Meat: *inaudible giggling*

You Germans are just sick. Then you make us think you are just joking with a “You never expect it”. I felt relief. I felt like maybe the world wasn’t such a morbid place after all. To my horror you immediately admit “But we do.” along with an ominous bass tone. I hate myself for writing about you.

Posted in Commercials

686 Comments so far

Audi Drivers Can Predict Accidents | Audi on September 28th, 2007

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Recipher on October 2nd, 2007

I just can’t understand how a parent could knowingly endanger their children like that. Absolutely insane.
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